Sunday, 15 April 2012

Fire on one end, sucker on the other!

Smoking jokes? Maybe an oxymoron, but I find some when I search the 'net:
"You know, lady, you don't actually smoke. The cigarette does all the smoking, you are just the sucker!"
CIGARETTE: A pinch of tobacco rolled in paper with fire at one end and a fool at the other!
http://smokeforwhat.com/quit-smoking-jokes.php


The Marlboro Man Died of Lung Cancer

I was conceived by a smoker, grew in the womb of a smoker, grew up in the home of a smoker, where cigarette smoke filled every crevice and I couldn't even go to the toilet without breathing in the foul excuse for air!

I breathed in my Grandma's smoke too and when she and mum were smoking together in the car there was no escape from that billowing, tar-filled substance.

Bored one afternoon, I lured my school friend into the garden shed, where we rolled pretend cigarettes and lit them. My step-father was horrified when he found the burnt matches - we had been sitting right near a couple of full petrol tanks! Needless to say, I was not in the good books.
When I was a teenager,  my boyfriend and I pinched a pack of Mum's Alpine Lights and hid behind the grand-stand at the local footy oval, where we smoked about three each and then spent an hour vomiting violently and fainting. I wasn't going to try that trick again!

I used to take a packet of smokes to school to be 'cool',  one of my old school friends accused me a few years ago of being the one who got her addicted. I didn't actually smoke the things though, so I must have been a good actor! It's always easier to blame someone else for your own problems.

Winston Tastes Good, Like a Carcinogen Should

My mum still smokes and now when we visit, my partner sits out in her patio and they chat and pollute their lungs together, making it impossible for anyone else to sit outside with them without choking on the stale, toxic air.

I love my partner, but I have to watch him light up hour after hour, minute after minute, and when I kiss and cuddle him I know I am inhaling dangerous, toxic chemicals. It makes me angry. He has had a cough for two weeks straight, and with heart problems in his family history, he shouldn't be touching the horrible mongrels. Listening to him cough makes me sad.

I hate the government for not doing more to help people quit and for filling their coffers with taxes they make from encouraging the addiction around the country. Such hypocrisy! Such a powerful, addictive drug which rips apart people's bodies and bank accounts, not to mention the damage done to the environment. There's no doubt about it,

smoking is no joke.  

Too much inhaling leads to life bailing